What if I can't???

Okay so I know that I am weird. There is actually quite a long list of ways that I am weird. One of these random things about me is that I can't ever remember a time when I ever felt like I couldn't do something. I don't know if it is because of how I was raised or just how God made me but nevertheless it's just the way I'm wired.
Now, don't be fooled, I have a crazy long list of will not do's and not willing to do's.... Just no Can'ts
Well today it happened...
After a 2 hour conference with my advisor i have come to the realization that I am a little further along than I thought (which is a good thing). However it means I will be finished with GMC after this quarter. That means I will be starting at GCSU in January.
I don't know if it is just not being prepared to hear that or hormones or what but I am freaking out!
All I can think is.... What if I'm not smart enough? What if I can't keep up? What if I can't learn that much? - These will be some serious history classes... Like what one normal class goes over in a week - we will spend entire semesters on.
Now my mind knows that I can do all things through Christ and that I have nothing to fear...
I just really need my heart to agree....

Where in the world an I from????

So, I keep getting asked this question:

Where are you from???

I have no clue how to answer it....
Here are my options:
1. Hiedelburg, Germany - where I was born
2.Jacksonville, Florida - where I lived the longest (from age 2 - 18)
3. From Milledgeville - where I live now and have lived for 9 years

Where am I from??????

The Desire of our Hearts

So, I am finally getting a chance to begin sharing some of what I learned last weekend at the Living Proof Live Simulcast I had the privaledge of attending. This week hasn't gone according to plan - but really, when does a week ever???

Beth spoke from Psalm 37:1-9. She said this was a theodicy, which means that it deals with the Justice of God and asking the question 'Will not the judge of all the Earth do right?'. (Other examples: Ps. 9, 37, 73 & Job) It was written to address the decision we each must make: Is our God good.
She shared 7 facts about verse 4 that we can claim as promises. (Don't worry - I'm only going to share the first two)

1. Nothing Dictates our Lives Like our Desires.
* The simple truth is people do what they want. That is why it is important to allow God to change our desires so we want what we need.
* We must ask ourselves: What do we really want from life? Has religion become ritual to us, have we lost the passion of relationship with God?
* For a desire to be a true heart's desire it must have been tested by time. They necessitate a wait and a sustained longing unaffected by mood, surroundings or circumstances. - This is why if we wait to long (past when God has opened the door and we just aren't willing to do the work to accomplish it) then hope is differed and it makes the heart sick.
* We must always be aware of if we are willing to do what it takes to have what God wants for us.

2. Beneath the Desires of our Hearts is the Heart of our Desires
* God will trump the desires of our hearts with the heart of our desires if destiny is at stake.
* The heart of our desires is what we want our lives to have been about - what motivates us?
* All of our desires stem from something we lack. God can use the things we lack to bring us to our destiny.
* He will only give us the heart of our desires after He has begun revealing to us what is at the heart of our desires.

Okay, I know that was a lot, but for me it was what I needed to hear. The fact that my desires come from something that I lack and that God will reveal what is at the heart of them really spoke to me. It is an important reminder to me that when I seek God and His will for my life He will help me see past the trivial wants I have to what my heart needs.
So only five more to go - it is hard to believe she tackled all of this in two days... But boy was it good stuff...